Touch Me Beca
by bechloe1802
Summary: It's Chloe's senior year at Barden and she's playing the leading lady in this year's senior musical, "Rocky Horror". When transfer student and assistant choreographer, Beca arrives how will she cope with her role and having Beca watching her every move on and off stage?
1. Perfect Transfer

**A/N: Hello good friends! I have had this one scene in my head for a while but I realized the scene I had in mind couldn't just be written as a one shot, so, here is a new fic for you all. I really hope you enjoy this first chapter and just FYI I was tired as shit and half falling asleep so I'm sorry if some of this doesn't make sense or is inaccurate. Anyway, please review and let me know if I should continue or not. I probably will continue it anyway because the scene I have in my head will be a little further on in the fic. It is a sexy little scene that I have in my head, just in case you wanted some encouragement. Enjoy guys.**

"Oh! Sorry."

Who is she? What is her name? That small brunette, who apparently is in a huge hurry. I don't have time to wonder long before I'm called to the stage for rehearsal. I struggle through the rehearsal, although, because it's technically our first full run through a lot of people are making mistakes here and there. I'm usually flawless when it comes to run throughs, but today I'm distracted by that strange girl, who didn't look like she belonged in a theatre at all. She had this Alt, punk look about her and honestly, it was a huge turn on. She wasn't part of the cast, I knew that, maybe the backstage crew? But what would she do? Not costumes and definitely not makeup. Maybe set? Possibly music? We haven't gotten to working with the band yet, so it was a big possibility.

I shuffle through my memories to see if I have seen her at school at all and I come up short. Shouldn't I have noticed if she was a senior? This is, after all the senior musical and it's tradition that only seniors participate. This year we are doing Rocky Horror and I am so excited for that because I've always loved it and finally, after years of practicing in the mirror, my time has come to play Janet. Her character has always drawn me in and Oh god, young Susan Sarandon...no wonder I'm gay. Now, I know what your next question will be. 'Is it hard to stage kiss men when you're gay?' Honestly, no. It's rather easier to stage kiss a man, because if there is no emotional or physical attraction then it's easier to stay in the moment and not forget your place on stage, that being said, it is sort of difficult in the way that I hate kissing men in general. I hate the stubble and the feel of their lips, so it's difficult to not let that show on stage, but, I think I've managed pretty well over the years.

Just as we get to the 'Time Warp' number, which is huge, the biggest number in the show, something catches my eye in the wings. I turn my head to look stage left and there she is. That brunette. She is working with us, but I can't seem to place what she's doing. One second she's tuning a guitar and the next she's walking over to the director and whispering in his ear. Just after she does, the director stops us and pulls 'Rif Raf', aka, my good friend Benji off stage before she takes his place. The director starts us again and suddenly this amazing voice breaks from the small woman. A voice unlike any other I've ever heard in my life, like a siren call. She runs through the number as Rif Raf, his vocals and choreography. I watch her with rapt attention, while also trying to remember what I'm supposed to be doing.

Once we finish the number she comes off stage and Benji takes his place back and we run through it again, I didn't notice that the brunette had actually altered some of the choreo. What was she doing? Who was she? I didn't have to wait to find out much longer because after we ran through 'Time Warp' again the director stopped us and introduced the mystery woman.

"As some of you know we were waiting for a transfer student to arrive from New York. This is Beca Mitchell and she is said transfer student. She goes to Julliard and studies music composition, choreography and dance and instrumental. Make her feel welcome as she is your assistant choreographer and vocal coach."

Whoa, she's...well...whoa. She does it all. The director calls the rehearsal and I find myself rushing over to talk to the small brunette.

"Uh, hi." I say smiling brightly at her.

She looks up at me and bites her lip for a moment. "Hey, I'm sorry I ran into you earlier."

"Yeah, it's totes fine, don't even worry about it. I'm pretty clumsy too..." Stop rambling Beale, she's looking at you like you're an idiot, or mentally deranged.

"Did you just say totes?" She smirks and I'm floored. My God she's gorgeous and evidently very talented.

"Uh, yeah. Anyway, why are you here if you're studying at Julliard? I mean that's quite an achievement for someone as young as you."

"How old do you think I am Red?" Oh no, don't call me Red, ugh my knees are weak.

"I don't know maybe like 17, you look too young to be 23 and in a senior's class."

"Wrong on both accounts. I'm 19." She smirks again and I am dead. R.I.P. me.

"How is that possible?"

"Well, I got early admition to Julliard and I'm a freshman there. The offer for Barden came up and I jumped at the chance. With this production I'll be able to skip up to my junior year before this year is even over."

"Whoa you're amazing." She chuckles deeply and I feel my cheeks heat. Oh god, I said that out loud.

"Thanks Red. Hey if you're not busy later maybe we could grab coffee and you could show me around campus?"

I nod before my mouth can even form words. "Yeah, sure I can do that. Which dorm are you in?"

"Baker Hall."

"Yep, cool. Well I'm in an apartment just off campus so why don't you come by around 4 ish? The campus is more beautiful late afternoon."

She smiles warmly and I see her eyes flit down nervously. "I bet it look beautiful whenever you're walking around."

I smile and duck my head to hide my blush. Oh my God, Chloe pull yourself together. I've never had a problem talking to women and such, but there was something about this woman, this tiny, talented brunette that made me nervous to even breathe.

"Chloe chill out, I've never seen you this nervous for a date." My best friend, Aubrey Posen, we've been friends since we could walk, sighs as I pace in front of my closet, occasionally throwing out clothes while I figure out what to wear.

For the record, I'm not nervous. Chloe Beale does not get nervous, sweaty palms, unsettling feeling in my stomach...occasionally but never nervous.

"I just want tonight to be perfect. I really like her Bree." I sigh.

"You've had one conversation with her Chlo, besides you just need to be yourself and it'll be fine."

"Be myself? Aubrey, I'm an actress, I don't know how to be myself." I say dryly as she folds her arms and looks at me.

"Oh, please. You're Chloe, 'I fart rainbows and burp sunshine' Beale and everyone that meets you falls in love with you. I'm amazed she hasn't shown up here with flowers and an engagement ring yet." She rolls her eyes as I continue rifling through my closet, eventually settling on light blue skinny jeans and a white blouse.

Looking in the mirror I study every inch of myself, much like I would before going onstage. I really want tonight to be perfect. Although it was never stated that this was a date, I had a feeling we both knew that it was, or at the very least, going to end up as one.

I bite my lip to hold in the teenager like squeal that wanted to escape as I hear a knock on the door of the apartment Aubrey and I share just off campus. Aubrey grips my shoulders and coaches me through breathing before she disappears to answer it. I can hear them in the living room small talking. I turn back to the mirror and take several deep breaths as Aubrey pokes her head back in.

"After your date, we are going to have a serious talk." She says sternly, narrowing her eyes at me before heading back out again.

"Okay Chloe, you can do this. She's just a woman, it'll be fine." I talk to myself in the mirror, flattening out my blouse and heading into the living room.


	2. My Place

**A/N: Wow, I am happy you guys like this idea. It makes me so happy that you are getting Bechloe content for now and to** **22-fall-in-love** **You are awesome as shit and I kinda spazed when you reviewed this and said you enjoyed it. Oh god I still can't believe it ahaha. Anyway, don't forget to review and let me know what you guys think.**

"Okay Chloe, you can do this. She's just a woman, it'll be fine." I talk to myself in the mirror, flattening out my blouse and heading into the living room.

I see her sitting on the couch, _my_ couch, in my living room and my heart jumps into my throat at the sight of her, sitting slightly slouched, one leg crossed over the other, a bouquet of flowers on her lap, while she studies them. Her lip pursed and her eyebrows drawn like she's re-thinking them. She looks amazingly badass in her black skinny jeans, band tee and leather jacket, complete with biker boots.

"You're thinking very loudly." I chuckle, trying to break the ice and her concentration.

She looks up at me quickly and her puzzled expression turns to one of genuine happiness and a little desire. I study her face as she slowly stands and hands me the flowers, Corinthians, and bites her lip. I don't miss the not so subtle flicker of her eyes as they trail down my body. When her eyes meet mine I raise my eyebrow and smirk at her.

"Like what you see? Or would you prefer a closer look?"

I see her cheeks redden at being caught out before she clears her throat and rubs the back of her neck.

I smile at her and decide to save her from her embarrassment and thanking her for the flowers before going into the kitchen to put them in water. I turn back to see she's followed me, like a puppy. She's so cute.

She holds up a helmet and smiles at me. I bite my lip and look at her confused.

"Well, you don't expect me to walk back to campus now do you?" My eyes widen as I realise what the helmet is for and it makes me shiver slightly, causing my breath to hitch. She rides a motorcycle. Ugh, just rip my jeans and panties off and fuck me now.

I take the helmet and follow her out to a black...well, I guess it's a Harley. I don't know a lot about bikes but I know the Harley logo. I'm really nervous because I've never been on the back of a motorcycle before, but I'm honestly a little turned on at the thought of Beca on a bike and...whoop, yep there's the thought of us fucking on it, oh god not right now. I can't think that right now.

"You going to get on?" On you yes. Oh god, her voice breaks me out of my thoughts and I notice she's already on the bike with her helmet on. I nod quickly and pull the helmet onto my head before straddling the bike behind her and wrapping my arms around her waist. I feel her shiver against me as my fingertips graze at her hips and my chest presses into her back.

She masks it by turning her head to look at me over her shoulder as she revs the bike. The unexpectedness of the engine makes me jump and she lifts her visor to yell over the roar. "Hold on tight Red."

I smirk and lean further into her as I respond. "You just want me closer to you." I feel her shoulders shake with a light chuckle, so I know she heard me before she turns back around and starts off down the street. It's loud but it's fun, and being cuddled up to Beca is a definite bonus, the vibrations of the bike are doing things to me and I lean closer to her, resting my head in the middle of her back.

I can hear my heart beating in my ears over the roar of the engine as Beca expertly dodges cars and people on the way back to campus. Earlier than I would have liked she stops the bike outside the theatre auditorium and turns the bike off, clasping her hands over mine she lets her fingers gently trail along my hand. I take the message and get off the motorcycle, pulling my helmet off and shaking my hair out before looking at her. I smirk to myself as I see she already has her helmet off and is looking at me with her mouth slightly open. I can see the desire in her eyes and it makes me shiver. I quickly regain my ability to speak as I walk past her. I let my finger trail down her jaw and under her chin.

"You should close your mouth or you might catch flies." I don't wait for her response as I continue to walk away from her and wait till I hear footsteps behind me.

"You got us to the theatre building and you seem to be able to move around campus without any trouble." I raise my eyebrow as we come to a stop. I look over at her and she's rubbing the back of her neck, I guess that's her nervous tick or something.

"Yeah, well I kinda got a tour of campus yesterday. I just wanted an excuse to get to know you."

Her nervousness makes me smile and I turn to face her. "You didn't need an excuse. We both knew this would become a date right?"

"I was hoping it would start as one." She says shyly and I can't resist smiling at her.

"Then a date it is." I nod and turn back to the theatre building.

"Why are we here though?" I ask curiously, cocking my head to the side.

"Well, I kinda thought that since we both love theatre so much we could maybe just hang out here and talk...and now that I keep talking I realise that you probably find that boring and stuff so we can do something more exciting or something like a restaurant."

I can't stop myself at giggling at the brunette's rambling. I clear my throat and shake my head. "I don't care about fancy stuff Beca. I just want to get to know you and maybe down the track we can do the romantic dates and things."

"Deal." She smiles and I see the bob in her throat as she swallows before reaching out and taking my hand as we head into the building.

Honestly, I've always loved being in here when it's empty. There's this feeling of freedom that feels more complete than what I get on stage. It's then I realise that I promised Beca a view of the campus at sunset. I grip her hand tighter and pull her through the building and up a hidden set of stairs at the back. I open up the manhole to the roof and climb through, helping her up and heading to the edge of the roof. We sit down and I dangle my legs off the roof in front of me as Beca sits cross-legged next to me. From where we are, we have the perfect view of the setting sun across the whole campus.

"Wow." I hear Beca mutter next to me and I smile, nodding in agreement.

"How'd you know this was here?" She asks and I tear my eyes away from the sun to meet hers as I shrug.

"I found it in my freshmen year and I always came up here to think...It's my place." I tack on at the end with another shrug.

"Your place?" She asks and I nod, looking back out over the view.

"Yeah, like a place of your own, that you think no one knows exists. A place you can go that doesn't have any rules or expectations. A place where you can be yourself and not have to worry about how you're seen. My place."

I turn back to her and she's just watching me, like I hold the secret to the universe.

"You're place." She smiles and nods.

"You don't have one?"

She shrugs and looks down at her hands, fiddling in her lap. "Dance is my place. I feel that way when I dance, but I don't have a physical place to go."

I reach over and interlock our fingers in her lap. "Well, we can share mine."

She bites her lip and lets out this cute little breath. "Do you bring many people up here with you?"

I think about it for a second and I realise I've never brought anyone up here, or told anyone about it. It just felt easy to tell Beca about it. I didn't even think twice about it.

I shake my head and smile down at our hands. "No, just you. I haven't even told anyone about it before."

She uses her free hand to tilt my chin up to look at her and my breath leaves my body at the look in her eyes. I instinctively lick my lips as she leans closer. Breathe Chloe. Deep breaths. Oh holy crap, she's going to kiss me. Breathe, Breathe. Our foreheads touch and my body freezes. Come on Chloe! You've kissed women before...you've done a lot more with women than kissing. Pull it together! She tilts her head and I follow instinctively. We're almost kissing and then...

 **A/N: Oh! I'm sorry, did I leave it there? Oh my bad. I guess you'll have to wait for the next chapter.**


	3. Hot 'n' Cold

**A/N: Okay. I figured I'd let you off the hook. It's been long enough to leave you hanging. I did intend to have this written a while ago, but I've been in and out of hospital lately. Anyway, on with the show, as they say.**

Beca's ringing phone causes her to snap back from the almost kiss and I try to hide my disappointment as she answers it, jumping up to walk a little way away from me. I don't hear a lot of the conversation, only picking up key words and Beca's tone of anger, or frustration maybe. A few moments later she walks back over.

"I should take you home." She says quietly.

I feel the disappointment run through me again. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah." She says after hesitating slightly. "I just forgot that I need to be somewhere."

I bite my lip and look up at her. I know she's lying but I let it go because she's looking at me like she's begging me to drop it. I clear my throat and nod.

"If you have to go, then I'll stay here a little longer and walk back to my apartment. It's fine."

I want her to disagree with me for some reason. This change in her mood has taken me by surprise. One minute she's playful and cute and trying to kiss me, then after one phone call she's acting like she wants to keep her distance. What the hell?

"Okay, if that's what you want to do. I'll see you at rehearsal I guess." She rubs the back of her neck and returns the stiff nod I give her before turning around and leaving me alone on the roof.

Did I scare her off? Who was on the phone that would change her mood so quickly?

"Chloe! You have rehearsal in an hour! Get your ass out of bed or I'll come in there and drag you out by your hair!"

Ugh, I really don't want to face today, knowing Beca will be there after what happened yesterday I don't really want to deal with it.

"Go away Aubrey! I'm awake!" I call back and listen for Aubrey's footsteps away from the door, before dragging myself out of bed to shower and get dressed. I'm too lazy today so I just throw on a pair of sweats, my old high school track hoodie, that's right, not just a theatre nerd here, and throw my hair up into a messy bun. It wasn't like we were working on any of my big scenes today, just mostly dance numbers.

I get to the theatre and immediately join the rest of the cast in stretching while we wait for the director. I look over my shoulder as I stand from a toe touch and notice Beca watching me, an intensity in her eyes that I've never seen before in anyone. It takes her a second to notice that I've caught her and she quickly turns around and starts fiddling with a couple of instruments. What is with her? Yesterday she was playful about her staring and today she's just being a little cold. I honestly don't get it. I don't have long to ponder on the thought as the director walks in and claps his hands.

"Alright guys, we're changing up the schedule for today. Where's my Brad?"

My good friend Jesse steps forward and I smile. I'm glad he's my Brad because we've been best friends since junior year of high school and he's so adorable and just a really great guy.

"You'll be working with Bumper on the Brad and Frank 'n' Furter scene, beginning of act 2." He nods and glares at Bumper. Bumper is a bit of an idiot and none of us really like him that much. He's great on stage and he's talented, but he's just a little too up himself.

"My Janet. You'll be working with Beca today on some vocal training for your final song."

I bite my lip and look over my shoulder at her again, but she has her back to me, organising the sheet music this time. Why would I be working with her on such a small song? It's not even the most difficult song, vocal wise, in the show. Nevertheless, I walk over to her and bite my lip.

"Hey."

She doesn't look up at me. "I think you need work on projecting your voice better for this song, you're too quiet." She says coldly as she hands me the sheet music. Is she serious? Not even a 'hi'? What have I done to her that is so terrible that she can't even look at me?

In any case, right now is not the time to talk about it. I just follow her into the soundproof booth backstage and place the sheet music in front of me. I get two lines into the song before she stops me.

"Project. You need to have your voice heard." I bite my lip and take a deep breath before starting over, only to be cut off again.

"No. Now there's no emotion to it. You need to be able to project yet keep the sweetness in the song."

I look at her standing in the corner, her arms folded as she watches me intently. It continues on like that, starting and stopping, until she throws her sheet music down.

"How is it so hard for you to project your damn voice?!" She yells and I retreat slightly as I watch her take a deep breath.

"We've been in here for an hour Beca and I haven't gotten through the whole song once! It's not even that long for God's sake!" I yell back.

I'm pissed at her for grilling me on this. I'm pissed at her for leaving me yesterday. I'm pissed because of this whole hot and cold thing with her.

"If you could understand a simple concept then we wouldn't have a problem!"

"If you told me exactly what you wanted then I would be able to understand!"

I know we aren't yelling about the song anymore and I know that she knows now too because her face and shoulders drop, like she's been defeated.

"You." She sighs and I look at her confused.

"Me what?" I see her raise her head to look at me, the intensity from earlier is back and suddenly my back is against the booth wall, her finger under my chin to hold my face up, keeping my eyes on hers.

"I want you." She breathes and I lick my lips before swallowing hard.

"Then have me." I reach up to wrap my arms around her neck until she pushes back and puts distance between us.

"It's not that easy." She puts her hands in her pockets and turns her back to pick up the sheet music she threw.

I let out a breath. Really? This hot and cold thing is getting old fast.

"Then explain it to me."

"Just drop it Red!"

Even though we're both angry that name still does things to my insides, but I'm still mad at her, so stop thinking about dirty things Chloe Beale. I'm an actress right? Master of the dramatic hair flick and exit. Well, my hair is up so no hair flick, but huff and exit. I slam the door on my way out for added effect.

If she was going to be cold with me, then I'll be cold with her.


	4. Here We Go Again

Hot, cold. Hot, cold. Hot, cold. I'm so freaking sick of it. I like to think I'm a fairly understanding person, however, when people don't explain what is going on, why they're being the way they are, it's hard to understand. It's the situation I'm in with _her_ right now. I don't understand because she won't tell me anything. I get it, we barely know each other. She doesn't even know my name, but that doesn't excuse her from being this way with me.

So I do what any girl would do in this situation. Social media stalking. I dig through her Facebook, twitter, Instagram, anything that has her name attached to it, you can bet I'm looking through all of it, but I find nothing to indicate why she'd be the way she is about us, but I come across an interesting fact. Her father is a professor here. I think I've seen him around before, judging by the photos I found of him, so I take the next logical step...

"Bree, do you know Professor Mitchell?"

"Yeah, he was my Comparative Lit Professor in junior year. Why?"

Would it be going too far to ask Aubrey to scope him out and possibly ask him about Beca? Nah, not for me to do anyway.

"Did you know he's Beca's dad?"

She turns in her seat and looks at me, eyebrow raised. "Beca as in, the Beca you want to bone, Beca?"

"Well...yeah. What's your deal with her anyway?"

"Where do I start? The tattoos, the piercings, the general 'I hate everything' look she has about her."

"Bree, I don't..."

"The fact she hurt you." She cuts me off and I sit there for a second and process the comment.

"How do you know she did?"

She gives me a 'seriously' look. "Oh come on Chlo, you haven't been the same since your "date". I'm your best friend. I know these things."

I roll my eyes, damn Aubrey for knowing me too well.

"Alright, fine she did. But, I'm sure she has her reasons. She was fine until she got a phone call."

She sighs and sits back, facing the TV again. "What do you want me to do?"

Score one for Beale!

Rehearsal over the next couple of weeks has been fairly uneventful. We've mostly just been focusing on the dialogue rather than the music, but Beca has been there every day, watching, sometimes making notes about God knows what.

I'm sitting with the rest of the cast off stage as Jesse works on his dialogue and blocking onstage right before 'Once In a While'. Just before he gets to the song Beca pulls him offstage and takes his position to sing the song without movement. I've personally always loved this song and hearing Beca sing it is just doing things to me and not in the 'I want to rip her clothes off' kind of way. It's more like the, 'my heart is pounding and my palms are sweaty' kind of way. She looks directly at me and I have to bite my lip and look away, a light blush making itself known on my cheeks, but the few seconds of eye contact we shared I could see nothing but sincerity and longing in her eyes.

Damn it Beca!

Here we go again.

Here she goes again.

Making me feel things other than anger and frustration.

When rehearsal ends and everyone leaves, I stay back and take my place on stage to sing my part of 'Superheros'. I feel the song right through my chest. I feel everything that has happened since _she_ showed up. Then rejection, the unexplainable, raw need I feel for her. The ache in my chest when I think about the day in the booth. I manage to get through the song and I hear clapping. I quickly turn around and see Beca leaning against the wall stage right.

"Your roommate asked my father about me. Why?" She questions without much pre-emption.

I bite my lip and make my way backstage to pack up my sheet music. I don't feel like playing this back and forth game that had become our conversations, but I feel her eyes on me the whole way.

"I wanted to know about you and your dad..."

She holds up her hand to interrupt me. "He's not my dad."

"Your father was the only person who'd know." Didn't get much out of him though. He doesn't seem to know you very well. I want to tack onto the end, but I don't want this to turn into an argument if I can help it.

"What about me? Didn't you think to ask me at all?"

I sigh. I'm so sick of this. I hate this. Ask her? Yeah right. She would never give me a straight answer. She wouldn't even stay in the room long enough to say 'hi' lately.

"I would've if you hadn't been giving me whiplash."

I look up at her and see the amusement dancing in her eyes and it just infuriates me further because God she's beautiful and perfect and...Ugh! No Chloe, you're mad at her. Cold routine remember?

"What?"

"This hot and cold routine Beca. I'm so sick of it. Just tell me the truth. Why, all of a sudden are you avoiding it anytime I bring up what happened on the roof?"

I watch her turn her head to look at the staircase that leads there.

"I...Red, look, feelings aren't easy for me okay. I'm no good at explaining how I feel. I shut myself off sometimes because of things I'm not ready to tell you. I mean it's crazy, I feel so many things for you but I don't even know your name and...It's just insane...I – you make me feel things."

She looks so lost. I can't stand it. I take the couple steps forward to close the distance between us and I turn her head back to look at me with a finger at her chin. She looks up at me and I see the bob in her throat as she swallows hard.

"I can't...the roof...it was a mistake. I shouldn't have tried to kiss you. Can't you just let it go?"

"Not this. I won't. Not when I know that I want this. I want you."

Her eyes lock onto mine before she smirks.

"Why couldn't you sing the song like that in the booth?"

"Because I couldn't feel it the way I could today."

My eyes flick down to her lips and I feel myself start to lean in.

"Tell me no. Tell me you don't want this and I'll back off."

She stays silent and I take that as an answer before leaning the rest of the way and claiming her lips in a tender kiss. God, her lips are soft. I feel her arms wrap around my waist and pull me closer to her as she tilts her head and tries to deepen the kiss before suddenly breaking away.

"I can't..." She breathes her breath warm against my lips still at such close proximity to hers.

I groan and step away from her, grabbing my bag. Dramatic exit take two...hair flick. Check. I stop at the door to turn back to her.

"My name's Chloe by the way."


	5. What the Hell Beca

**A/N: Alright dudes. I probably should've mentioned this before but this will be a G!P fic. If that's not your thing then this ain't the fic for you. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review and let me know what you think.**

I'm so mad at her. I really mean it this time. She wanted more from that kiss and I know it. What is wrong with her? Why won't she just let it happen? I need to know what's going on. I decide to scope through her social media one more time.

I find a recent picture of her on her Facebook. She's standing with a woman around her age and a baby. Family maybe? I read the caption: _Missing these two so much, Can't wait to get back to NY_. I bite my lip and start scrolling through the comments. There's one that I assume is from the other woman in the picture.

 _We miss you too baby. Ollie can't wait to see you either._

Baby?

Okay, what the hell is going on here?

Is that her girlfriend or something?

I make it my mission to find out the truth within the next week.

I'm just going to confront her.

Ask her directly.

That way she can't avoid me. I go to rehearsals Monday morning with a determined head on my shoulders. I can do this. Don't freak out Chlo. Maybe it's my fault anyway. I mean, I didn't really take no for an answer.

No.

She's the one who asked me on a date. How was I supposed to know she was unavailable? I'm just going to be polite yet direct. No need to lose my head like a jealous girlfriend. They might not even be together. Just stay calm Chloe Beale.

Just stay...

"Who is she?!" _Calm._

"What?"

"Who is she Beca? The girl on your Facebook?"

I know I've busted her with something because she looks up at me guiltily and bites her lip.

"Red, I can explain – "

"No! You don't get to do that! You don't get to call me that!"

By this point, I'm aware that the entire senior theatre class is watching us. I notice Jesse looking at me, confused and slightly sympathetic, but honestly I'm way too angry to care right now.

"Chloe – "

"She your girlfriend? Is that it?" I cut her off.

The words that come out of her next break me. Yeah, we haven't known each other long but I was really letting myself fall for her, even with the hot\cold thing.

"She's my wife." She says quietly, almost defeated.

Everyone in the building goes silent. She's 19 for God's sake. Why would she be married?

Why would she ask me on a date?

"Oh right. So what? I was just something to keep your bed warm while you're here?" She runs her hands through her hair before glaring up at me.

"Hey! I told you I couldn't. You. Kissed. Me. You're the one who didn't take no for an answer!"

"I would've if you told me the truth!"

With that I stomp back out of the building and start running.

Running has always helped me clear my head and I appreciate the burn in my legs and my lungs when I really push myself.

I don't stop until I get back to the apartment. Luckily Aubrey's in class, so I head upstairs and take a shower. The water freezing me to my bones is almost therapeutic, numbing my mind until all I can think about is the pain.

That's how Aubrey finds me 20 minutes later, curled up on the shower floor, tears running down my face, burn in my throat, ache in my chest.

She coos and helps me up, dressing me and laying me in bed. I turn away from her and I feel her sit on the edge of my bed.

"She's married Bree." I manage t get out, barely above a whisper.

"How can that be? She's 19. Who gets married at 19?"

"I don't know. I didn't stay long enough for the sorry excuse of an explanation." I spit out. I'm absolutely seething that I didn't know this sooner. I feel like an absolute idiot for putting myself out there with her and being humiliated for it.

Not long after I've been tucked in, Aubrey knocks on my door.

"Chlo, Jesse's here." She says quietly.

I don't even bother turning over or sitting up as the bed dips beside me. I don't want to talk about it and I know Jesse is going to make me. Well, he's going to try. I refuse to talk about this right now.

"You wanna tell me what that was?" Yep, I knew it.

"Not really in the mood." I shrug.

"Well, you better get your ginger ass in the mood."

I huff and get up, throwing on a pair of sneakers.

"I don't want to talk about it Jesse! Let it go!" I snap before heading out of the apartment to the one place I can be safe to be alone.

"Figured you'd come up here eventually."

I hear her voice behind me and stand quickly to head back to the manhole. I should've known she'd come here looking for me. I almost regret showing her this place on the roof, but a little part of me is glad she came looking for me.

"Chloe, wait. Please just let me explain?"

"No. Now get out of my way."

I go to push past her, but her hand warps around my wrist and pulls me close to her.

"I don't love her."

I bite my lip and cross my arms, forcing her to let me go.

"Is that not what everyone looking for an affair says?" Sassy. Nice job Chloe.

She lets out a small chuckle.

"Yeah, I guess they do, but I mean it. I don't love her. I lo... It's complicated."

I raise my eyebrow and tilt my head, giving her silent permission to continue.

I watch her take a deep breath and look down at her hands, twisting her hand around the bare skin of her fourth finger on her left hand.

"Sarah and I, we – we met in freshman year of High School and I guess I loved her then, but not now."

"That...sounds like a whole lot of bullshit Beca. I can't believe I let myself fal – think you would be any different from anyone else." Nice save Chloe.

"I am different Red. Please just give me a chance?"

I scoff and roll my eyes. "I'm not going to be the other woman Beca."

I go to push past her again, but this time she spins me around and crashes our lips together. There's nothing tender about it. It's hot, passionate, and a little dirty and it's starting to do things to me. No Chloe, you need to get out now.

I pull back and perfect the moment with a sharp slap to her left cheek before leaving. She lets me go this time and I head back to the apartment. The sun has now set, so hopefully Jesse will be gone and I can just crawl into bed with no drama or having to talk.

For once, luck is on my side as I enter the apartment and head straight to my room without being stopped. Aubrey just looks up at me from her spot on the couch with a sympathetic smile. I collapse on my bed with a sigh and touch my lips where I can still feel that kiss lingering.

I know I'm mad at her, but holy crap that kiss was intense. My lips are still burning and I can't help but wonder about one thing.

Who's the baby?


	6. Professional Decision

**A/N: I know it has been a while my fellow aca-people. I'm sorry about that but thank you for all the reviews on this story and I love that you love it. On with the show!**

I get up the next morning with a more positive outlook on things, now that I can list the facts.

Fact One. So, Beca is married...at 19. Each to their own right?

Fact Two. Beca wants me. Still not sure why.

Fact Three. Beca may or may not have a child with secret wife.

Fact Four. There's no way I can stay away from her.

Fact Five. I'm falling in love with a married woman.

I go to rehearsals with the full intent to avoid one Beca Mitchell. However, fate seems to be against me because once again I am thrust into the booth with her. This time to work on 'Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me'.

Oh God.

The most sexual song for my character and I have to sing it, repeatedly, in front of her.

We make it through three times before she starts shaking her head in frustration.

"It doesn't feel right." She mutters to herself.

"What doesn't?" I ask, slightly out of breath.

I'm thankful we can keep it professional today. The way it should be. No feelings.

"Something. It just doesn't..." She huffs and yanks open the booth door.

Oh-Kay, that was rude.

I look up and see her standing at the door waiting for me. I follow her out, still unknown to me why we're heading to the stage.

"It needs movement. It needs passion." She clears her throat and holds her right hand out to me.

I bite my lip and hesitantly take it. As soon as it's secured in her hand she pulls me closer and runs her left hand down my waist, exposed by the crop top I'm wearing and I feel a pull in my gut as I feel the cold metal of her wedding ring, at least she's honestly wearing it now.

I resist the urge to pull away as I feel her lips against my ear.

"Sing and follow my lead." She whispers and I feel a shiver coarse through my body, reluctantly nodding.

I start singing and she turns me around to pull our fronts together.

She's looking at me like no one else is even in the building.

She's smiling and I can't fight the urge to return it as I lose myself in the song and in her arms.

She picks me up and I wrap my legs around her waist as I continue to sing.

I'm vaguely aware that Jesse is watching us with a raised eyebrow, but I pay no mind to it.

Beca's hands on me feel incredible and I try as hard as I can to swallow down the moan that builds in me, but without luck. It escapes me in between lines and I'm too into the moment to even really feel embarrassed by it.

I notice Beca's mouth turn up into her signature smirk at the sound and it doesn't help my current situation.

Repeat the first fact Chloe!

Beca is married.

Beca _IS_ married.

 _BECA IS MARRIED._

She is – Oh fuck it.

Before I know what's happened our lips are connected, roughly, unabashed and uncaring.

I'm lost in the feel of her hands and her lips that I don't even realise she's walked us back into the booth, until I feel my back being slammed against the door.

Eventually she pulls back and I use the time to catch my breath and slow my racing heart.

She rests her forehead against my shoulder and sucks in breath after breath.

"Red, there's something I need to tell you."

I bite my lip and tilt my head back. In the back of my mind I know what she's going to say but I can't bring myself to accept it. I need to hear her say it though.

I need to hear it.

"I have a son."

"Ollie?" I swallow hard and feel her nod against my shoulder.

"He's biologically mine and Sarah's."

I feel my eyebrows pull together. How does that even?

"I'm intersex."

I raise my eyebrow still slightly confused, until I feel her hips pressed into mine.

Oh. _Oh!_

I bite my lip and debate with myself. I don't even know why I would. I mean I'm already falling in love with her.

I've already kissed a married woman, three times.

Why should this matter?

It doesn't.

I lift her chin to force her to look at me. I study those dark grey eyes intently before making up my mind.

"I don't care. I want you. I want this."

I feel the relief come over her as I lean back in and forcefully claim her lips before pulling back again.

"But, we need to have a serious talk before this goes any further."


	7. Honesty Time

**A/N: Another chapter! Aren't you lucky! It's like 4 in the morning, so excuse if this chapter is random and not well written.**

Beca and I agreed to meet for coffee on Saturday and as I sit across from her in the small cafe on campus I notice how nervous she is.

I can tell she doesn't really want to have this conversation, neither do I really, but we both now it needs to happen before...whatever this is between us goes any further.

She fiddles with her cup on the table and barely even looks at me. We've been sitting here in silence for the past ten minutes and I'm getting sick of it.

This conversation needs to happen and it needs to happen now.

Buck up Chloe!

Talk!

Use your words!

"So, like, what is this?"

Real articulate Chloe!

Damn it!

At least she looks up at me for the first time since we sat down.

"Well, what do you want this to be?"

"I think you should answer that first Becs."

She bites her lip and looks down again, back to fiddling with her cup.

"You know what I want."

"For the sake of this conversation let's say I don't."

"I want you."

She sighs and looks back up at me and the intensity I've noticed since we met is back and it makes my breath catch in my throat.

Keep it together Beale!

"In what way? You can't just say you want me."

She shrugs and stays quiet. I clear my throat and shake my head.

"Look, we need to look at the facts of this situation. You're married – "

"I told you I don't love her." She cuts me off and I sigh.

"You're married and you're a mother."

"Well I didn't exactly plan on meeting you."

"Regardless. We need to figure this out."

She sucks in a breath and lets it out quickly.

"Maybe I should explain everything."

"Maybe you should."

I watch her as she plays with her wedding ring, twisting it around her finger, before lifting her hand and rubbing the back of her neck.

"Like I told you, Sarah and I met in freshman year of high school. I really thought I loved her and I know she loved...loves me. We slept together in junior year and in senior year we...she...she got pregnant. I thought I was doing the right thing by marrying her and being there for her. I realised I wasn't in love with her anymore just before the summer of senior year, but I slept with her again because I needed to feel...something, anything."

My heart aches in my chest as I watch her, staying quiet as she takes a breath to gather her words.

"But, I married her anyway because I thought that was how I was going to be responsible for my mistake. When Ollie came along, I took one look at him and it felt...right. Being his mother. I may not love Sarah, but I love my son."

"Does she know?"

She shakes her head. "No, I try as hard as I can to play happy family with her and Ollie because I don't want him growing up like I did. I can't bring myself to tell her that the love isn't there, I can't break her heart like that. I'm not that kind of person."

I find myself intrigued by her past, so I press further.

"How did you grow up?" I ask quietly, trying not to scare her off.

"My father walked out on my mother and I not long after I was born. He never tried to keep in contact. My mom raised me on her own and I never heard from my father until I found out I was coming to Barden and that's when I found out he worked here, but I want nothing to do with him."

That's why her father didn't know anything about her. It makes sense. I actually thought her was a good guy but hearing this from Beca has made me rethink my opinion on him.

"Okay, if we are going to do this I need to know how it will work." I take a deep breath and bite my lip as I wait for her to respond.

"Well, pretty much like any other relationship, except it needs to stay off social media."

"Okay, I can do that, but no more secrets Beca. You need to be honest about everything."

"I can do that."

"Good."

She sighs in what sounds like relief before looking me straight in the eye.

"So we're doing this?"

I swallow hard. God, I hope this doesn't come back around to bite me in the ass. Neither of us brings up the silent truth that she will eventually go back to NY, back to her wife and child. We will cross that bridge when we come to it.

"Yeah. We're doing this."


	8. Plans and Frustration

**A/N: Hey aca-nerds, so I know I've been gone for a little while and I apologize. I was grieving over the fact that MOT is finally finished and I kind of miss it already, but here I am and I hope you enjoy this very disgustingly short chapter my dudes. It's just until I sit down and write out a full chapter for you.**

I never realised how hard this would actually be. Being involved with Beca came with a few rules of what I could and couldn't do. For example: no social media posts about our relationship, that rule is fairly easy to follow, however, she also requested that rehearsals stay professional. That rule is a little harder to follow, especially since she is the assistant chorographer and we have to work very closely on a lot of numbers in the production.

The rules aren't the only thing that I'm finding hard about this relationship. It's also hard to watch her walk into my apartment and take her ring off as she crosses the threshold. It makes me feel like a dirty little secret, which...I guess, I kind of am. People at Barden know but outside of campus we are just really close friends.

I can't be that much of a dirty secret though, considering we haven't even slept together. She's being really sweet about it all, wanting to make sure I'm comfortable and that I'm okay with everything. It is really nice that she's taking her time with this. It makes me feel less...dirty I guess, but in all honesty what I want more than anything is for her to pin me down and fuck the life out of me.

I know, I know, I should be patient, but the sexual tension is _killing_ me. Ugh, but she has been pretty close to perfect. She brings me flowers and little presents all the time and it makes me swoon. She shows me pictures of her and Ollie and if I'm being 100% honest, it makes my ovaries weep.

It's cuteness overload and I just can't deal.

"I want to meet him one day." I say to her one afternoon as we sit on the couch, my feet in her lap as I scroll through the album on her phone specifically for pictures of Ollie.

"You do?"

I look up at her and nod, confused as to why she'd be surprised by that.

"Why?" She asks, cocking her eyebrow.

"Well, you talk about him a lot. It's obvious that you love him and that he's a big part of your life and I want to know that side of you. I want to see you with him, how he is with you."

She sits for a minute in thought before biting her lip and looking down, playing with my toes.

"Well, would you want to come to New York?"

I raise my eyebrows. Did she seriously just ask me that? Does she mean for like ever, or like a vacation?

"What do you mean Becs?"

She shrugs and doesn't lift her head as she speaks.

"Well, I was thinking, for about a week now, would you want to come to New York with me over break?"

I sit for a while and process what she's asking. When I continue to stay silent, she looks up at me and shakes her head.

"Never mind, forget it. It was just a dumb thought."

"Wait, Beca, at least let me answer." I laugh and roll my eyes.

Could I really do it? Go home with her and meet her son? Meet her wife?

Ugh.

That word still tastes so sour to me.

Of course I could do this. I will do this.

"A trip to New York sounds perfect Beca."

I smile and sit up, straddling her lap and attaching my lips to hers gently before moving down to nip at her neck softly.

I feel her release a sharp breath and subtly lift her hips into mine.

"Chlo." She whines and I smile against her skin before grazing my teeth along it.

"Baby, come on." I not so subtly roll my hips down against hers and I feel her member pressing against me through her jeans.

"Chloe. Not now. Not yet."

I groan and pull back rolling off her lap and back onto the couch. I am so damn frustrated over this. I need something, anything from her.

"When then?" I can't keep the impatience out of my voice.

"Soon. Just...not yet."

I roll my eyes and get up off the couch, flipping my hair over my shoulder as I look at her.

"Fine. I am going to have a very cold shower, so while I'm gone I suggest you take care of the tent in your jeans."

I throw her a playful wink before heading upstairs. I hear her groan as I head up and I chuckle to myself.


	9. Morning Dances and NYC

Okay, so let's do another fact check.

Fact One: Beca and I are together.

Fact Two: Beca is still married.

Fact Three: I am going with her to meet her wife and son on break.

Fact Four: We still haven't had sex.

Yes, I know it's not all about sex but if I'm being honest Beca is so beautiful and I just can't help myself wanting her in that way, especially when she dances.

I mean, really dances. I caught her one morning, while she was making me breakfast, I know, she's so perfect, I caught her moving her hips while she hummed whatever song was playing in her earphones. I was about to say something, but then she just, I don't know, she just went for it and started twirling herself around the kitchen. It was like watching a six year old dancing around like Fred and Ginger, only Beca was flawless. She was so graceful, which is funny because only the day before I found her lying in a pretzel like shape because she tripped over the coffee table and managed to take everything on the table with her.

I eventually tapped her on the shoulder, but she just grabbed me and spun me around, pulling us together and leading us into a dance that I had no music for, only the light sounds of her humming.

I could get used to this. Having this every day, and then it hit me. This feeling, I can' give it a name. It was just there.

Sarah probably used to get mornings like this. She probably still does when Ollie's around.

Sarah's her wife.

I'm just her affair.

Beca must have noticed the frown that I'm sure was on my face at those thoughts, because in the next second I was sitting at the breakfast bar, her next to me.

"What's wrong Chlo?"

 _What were words?_

I couldn't for the life of me, find words to explain how I felt. I guess I didn't really want her to feel bad, but also I couldn't put into words how I was feeling. I just used one word. One word and the recognition on her face was enough to know that she understood.

"Sarah."

She sighed and I felt my heart drop.

She feels just as guilty as I do that we're doing this behind her back.

Beca has spoken to Sarah about me. I know because I overheard a phone call between them one day.

 _Best friend._

 _I want you to meet her._

 _Really good friends._

That's what Sarah knows me as.

Beca's really good friend.

"Chloe, listen to me. I've told you a million and one times that I don't – "

"You don't love her."

I cut her off and sighed.

"That's not the point though Beca. I'm going to New York with you as your 'really good friend' and I have to sleep in the guest room or on the couch while you're in your room with your wife. I'm always just going to be the affair in this."

"You were never just an affair to me Chloe. Ever. I wouldn't do that to you. We will make it work in New York. I will find a way we can have couple time okay? Even if I have to sneak into your room late at night, like we're in high school." She said with wiggle of her eyebrows and I can't hold in my chuckle.

"I just...Chloe I want you to meet Ollie and build a relationship with him, while he's still young, so that when I do leave her I know that you and him will get along."

"You're going to leave her?"

"Eventually."

I rolled my eyes. "What does that even mean Beca?! When Ollie's 16?!"

"Chloe I am trying here. I really am. I'm trying to keep everyone happy and not hurt anyone with all this. I just need a little more time." She said calmly and wrapped her arm around my waist, pressing a kiss to my temple.

"Now, get your breakfast before it goes cold."

So, break came around a lot faster than I would have expected and we are sitting on plane that has just pulled into New York. Sarah is picking us up from the airport, so I lean over to Beca and claim her lips in a rough, passionate kiss, because I don't know when the next time I'll be able to kiss her will be.

We collect our bags and head to a tall blonde woman, once she spots us, Beca drops my hand. Sarah. She walks to Beca with a smile so huge I'm worried her face will split. I look over to Beca and she also has a smile on her face. I breathe a sigh of relief when I notice that it's not the way she smiles at me.

It's smaller.

Firmer.

As Sarah reaches us she pulls Beca into a soft kiss and I have to look away and suppress my gag reflex. I feel disgusting. Beca has done her best to not make me feel like a dirty secret, but in that moment, that's exactly how I felt.

What if this was a mistake?

What if I can't do this?

We are here for a week and I'm already struggling to hide my jealousy.

"I missed you so much baby."

I swallow the bile rising up my throat as Beca replies.

"I missed you too honey. Where's my baby boy?"

"He's at home with his aunt Emily."

"Emily's here?" Beca lights up at the mention of this girl.

"And you must be Chloe. Nice to meet you."

I look at her and shake the offered hand, putting on my best Beale smile.

"You too Sarah. I've heard so much about you."

"Likewise. Although, the way Beca talks about you, you'd think she was in love with you." She laughs and I follow dryly.

"Don't try and steal my girl." She warns, lightly, playfully and I laugh nervously.

How in the fuck am I going to get through a week of this?

We get in the car and it hits me again, that feeling, as Beca gets in the front passenger side. I sit in the backseat and watch as they hold hands, the whole drive back to their home, Sarah stealing kisses at every red light.

I watch Beca's eyes as they stare at me through the mirror, the whole drive. I keep my eyes on her dark blue through the mirror. I glance quickly at Sarah, who is talking about something, not even paying attention to the two of us and I decide to tease Beca a little.

If I'm struggling through this trip, I will make sure she's struggling too. I lock eyes with her again through the mirror and slowly, subtly, lick my lips, pushing my chest out to take my jacket off.

I watch her swallow hard and I cross my legs and lean back, pulling my phone out.

 _Chlo: Do you regret not sleeping with me while you had the chance back home?_

I put my phone down and watch her pick hers up, subtly tilting the screen away from Sarah. I see her take a deep breath as she taps out a reply.

 _Becs: When Sarah is asleep you better be ready._

 _Chlo: Ready for what?_

 _Becs: You'll see._

I let out a breath. Is she seriously going to have sex with me while her wife is asleep in another room? Oh my God, the thought is actually turning me on.

Maybe this trip will be bearable.


	10. I Need Her

**A/N: Hello! I know I've been gone for a while, but hopefully I can make up for it with this chapter. SLIGHT SEXY TIMES AHEAD, COVER YOUR EYES CHILDREN!**

You remember how I said that this trip would be bearable?

I was so wrong. This is unbelievably unbearable. We've only just gotten back to the house and I already want to hide from Sarah. At least I got to meet Emily.

Emily is Beca's younger stepsister and she is the total opposite of Beca. She's bubbly and excitable and it's nice to have someone here that I can talk to without feeling guilty for something.

The unbearable comes from watching Beca and Sarah interact, at least there's some comfort in the fact that it's obvious that Beca isn't comfortable with the affection she's forced to show. She's barely smiled a real smile since we met Sarah at the airport.

That is...until she saw her son. I have never seen Beca behave like that before. It was a bit of a surprise when Beca held the little boy and started talking to him in this super cute baby voice. It was one of the cutest things I've ever seen in my life.

"So, how is Beca doing at Barden?" Sarah asks me as Beca plays with Ollie on the floor.

"She's doing amazing. She's so talented and I think with her help this show will be perfect." I smile, thinking about how much our entire cast has changed since Beca came along.

"I'm glad she has a friend there. She's never been good at making friends."

There it is again.

Friend.

That's what I am to Beca when Sarah is involved.

I look down at my hands and nod.

"Yeah." I say quietly.

"Hey, baby, can you feed him for me while I take a shower?" She asks Beca who looks up and nods.

Sarah heads upstairs and Beca takes Ollie into the kitchen.

"I should get going. I've got work tomorrow." Emily smiles and says her goodbyes, calling goodbye to Beca before leaving.

I head to the kitchen and lean against the counter, sighing.

"How are you holding up baby?"

I look up at Beca and run my hands down my face.

"I didn't think it would be this hard."

I don't know how much longer I can take this. I feel like I'm losing my mind and it hasn't even been 24 hours yet.

Beca puts Ollie in his highchair and wraps her arms around me.

"I know and I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with this. I want us to be able to be together but I just can't. Not yet."

I turn around in her arms and cup her cheeks.

"I know Becs. I'm not trying to rush you."

I lean down and kiss her gently.

"Come to bed with me tonight."

She sighs and pulls away to feed Ollie.

"Just tell Sarah you're staying up late to mix. Beca please, I need you tonight."

"Need me how?" She smirks up at me and I smile.

There's the Beca I know.

Playful.

I bite my lip and walk to her, running my finger down her jaw.

"You know exactly how I need you. How I want you."

I run my finger down her chest and stomach, cupping the bulge in her jeans and rubbing slightly.

Yeah I feel a little weird doing this with her son sitting next to her, but I need her to know I won't take no for an answer.

She sucks in a shuddering breath as I nibble on her earlobe.

We both jump when we hear Sarah coming back downstairs and I jump away from Beca, who is tomato red and squirming uncomfortably. I just hope Sarah doesn't notice.

She doesn't.

I can breathe.

She starts making us dinner as Beca cleans Ollie up.

"I'll cook baby. Why don't you give him his bath?" Beca suggests.

Sarah doesn't second guess it and takes him out of the highchair and upstairs.

Beca gets up and backs me up against the counter and suddenly, I can't breathe. She's so close, her hips brush up against mine as she moves impossibly closer to me.

"You're in trouble now Beale." Her voice is dangerously low and it sends sweet heat down into my lower stomach.

I swallow hard and bite back my moan as she rolls her hips against mine. I grab the back of her neck and pull her into a harsh kiss.

She lets out a gasping moan and meets me with equal ferocity.

God I've never felt like this before.

Not with any girl I've been with before.

She makes me feel...animalistic.

The passion between us is primal.

Dangerous.

Oh so hot.

I feel her hands make their way to the backs of my thighs as she lifts me and sits me on the counter.

I wrap my legs around her waist and draw her close, my hands in her hair, tangle and pull.

God I want her.

I need her.

Now.

She seems to read my mind because her hips are rolling into mine again and I can't stop the light moans escaping between kisses.

I can feel her pressed against her jeans, and it doesn't feel small at all.

"Becs." I whisper through a light moan, then suddenly she pulls away and it takes me a second to realise why.

I hear Sarah coming back downstairs and I jump off the counter as Beca tries to flatten her hair and wipe my lipstick off her mouth.

I fix my own appearance before she sees us and Beca finishes dinner for the three of us.

God, I can't wait till Sarah goes to bed.

I will have Beca tonight.

Whatever it takes.


	11. First Night

**A/N: I'D LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS CHAPTER TO MY GODDESS...YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE BABYGIRL! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!**

 **Also, Sexy times ahead. Cover your eyes kids. Enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review and let me know what you think.**

The clock hit midnight and Sarah's still not asleep. It's kind of annoying actually, but I can't really complain that much...actually, you know what? I do have a right to complain. Beca is my girlfriend and I really want to just fall into bed with her.

All three of us are sitting in an awkward silence in the living room, glasses of wine in our hands. Beca holds Sarah's hand loosely and I struggle to keep my eyes off of Beca or their joined hands.

I honestly can't do this anymore tonight. I need sleep. I chug the rest of my glass and stand up, wishing them both goodnight before heading up to the spare room.

I just want to go back to Barden.

Back to mine and Beca's little bubble.

Am I jealous?

Hell yes I'm jealous.

I want Beca to myself.

I don't want to have to share her with her wife.

Ollie is a different story.

He is the perfect little boy and he has Beca's deep blue eyes, and you can already tell that he'll have the Mitchell smirk when he gets older.

He'll be quite the lady killer, or man killer, or whoever he prefers and he seems to like me, which is a good start.

I was holding him earlier and he just giggled and played with my hair the whole time. He doesn't talk yet, but he babbles, after all he's only six months old.

Anyway, I get up to the spare room and pull my sleep shorts out of my bag and I'm just pulling my jeans off when I hear a quiet knock on the door, so quiet that I'm not even sure if it's real. I throw my jeans onto the bed and bend over to pull my shorts on when I feel a presence behind me. I stand up quickly when an arm wraps around my waist and start to let out a squeal when another hand closes on my mouth.

I take a breath through my nose and I recognise that smell.

Beca.

My Beca.

I smile under her hand as she kisses my temple.

"You look so cute in your shorts."

I bite my lip as she lets go of my mouth, wrapping her arm across my chest. I lean my head back against her shoulder and it just feels...it feels right.

It feels like I belong there.

In her arms.

I can't even begin to explain how I feel when I'm around her. It's like I'm...I just...I can't explain.

My feelings for her are so intense and they grow everyday and honestly, I'm a little worried.

I'm worried that I'm setting myself up for this big fall.

This big heartbreak, that no matter what I do I can't prevent it.

I don't want to be just a fling for her and as much as she tells me I'm not, as safe as I feel with her, I can't stop myself thinking that that is exactly what I am.

"She went to bed?"

"No, not yet." I can hear the sadness and frustration in her voice, she wants this as much as I do.

"Beca, where does she think you are?"

"She thinks I'm mixing and she wouldn't dare come into the study when I tell her I am."

"So I have you now?" I ask with a small smile.

I feel her turn her head and kiss down my face.

"Yes, you have me now."

I bite my lip and turn in her arms, wrapping mine around her shoulders.

God I want to tell her, but it's way too soon. I couldn't possibly tell her yet.

God damn it, I'm in love with her.

I'm in love with everything about her.

The way she talks.

The way she smiles.

The way she holds me.

I'm in love with her hands, the way they expertly moving across a mixing board.

I'm in love with her eyes, especially when she's looking at me.

But I can't tell her, not yet anyway.

"Chlo, I..."

"What is it Becs?"

"I'm...I...uh-never mind, it's not important."

She smirks at me and tilts her head up to brush her lips against mine and it sends all kinds of shock waves right through my body.

"Come to bed with me."

It's not a request or a question. I need her now, I want her now.

I take her hands and pull her with me towards the bed, sitting on the foot of it, I pull her down into a kiss that makes my own head spin.

I'll never get tired of the way she kisses me. She kisses me like I'm her only source of oxygen, that if she stops kissing me she'll die.

I love that.

I love feeling that wanted, that appealing.

She pushes against me and I fall onto my back, crawling up the length of the bed, I lean against the headboard and smirk at her with a raised eyebrow, as she studies me, her arms folded, playful smile on her lips.

I summon her with a crooked finger and she crawls up the bed on top of me, leaning down to kiss every bit of skin she can, on her way up.

I look up at her when we're eye to eye and she just stares back at me, smirk in place, but not a teasing one like it would normally be, no, this one says 'I win', like I'm the prize in some invisible game.

"What's that look for?" I ask amusedly.

"Just...you're beautiful and I am so lucky."

"Is that right?" I tease and bite my lip as she nods and grips under my thighs, wrapping my legs around her waist.

We fit together so easily and it feels so perfect being with her.

I lean up and kiss her, softly, but full of passion and she returns the kiss with equal enthusiasm. Lips locking, tongues dancing, teeth grazing. So slow, yet so hot at the same time.

I drag my hands up her back and tug her T-shirt over her head, throwing it behind us somewhere, I don't really care where, because her lips have found their way to my neck as they kiss, suck and nip at the soft skin there.

"Don't leave marks." I breathe out, breathing is getting very hard to do at this point.

I feel her nod against my neck and go back to what she was doing, only softer this time.

God, her lips feel so good, that I can't stop myself from letting out a small moan. She quickly reaches and hand up to cover my mouth and...oh my Lord baby Jesus, it just turns me on more.

"You have to be quiet Red." I hear her whisper against my neck.

Oh God again with calling me that. I nod rapidly in response and she takes her hand away to pull my tank top off over my head. She sits back to look at me and I resist the urge to cover my chest.

She's looking because she finds you attractive, let her look. I chastise myself and look down to avoid her gaze and what I see is a slight confidence booster.

Beca is already semi-hard, I can see the bulge in her jeans and I look back up at her, pulling her into another earth shattering kiss, as my hands make their way to her belt.

She grabs my hands just as they unbutton her jeans.

"Baby, I don't have a condom."

I bite my lip and sigh before counting in my head to myself.

"No, it's okay. I've been taking my pill. We're fine." I reassure her.

She looks at me hesitantly before nodding and pulling her own jeans off, followed by her boxer briefs.

The breath gets caught in my throat as I take in the size of her. She's about five and a half to six inches long and she's still only semi-hard. I swallow the lump in my throat and roll us over so I'm straddling her thighs.

I lean down and kiss her roughly, taking her length in my hand and pumping her slowly. She lets out a grunt into my mouth and I pull away to move down her neck as her fingers slide up my torso and over my chest.

I whimper when she runs a thumb over my right nipple, and bite down on her collarbone, which causes her to moan in response. I pull back quickly and bite my lip, listening for any footsteps headed our way.

I sit for a good few seconds before releasing my breath and shaking my head with a slight laugh.

She chuckles in return and pulls me in by the back of my neck. I return my hand to work and increase my speed before stopping abruptly, much to the disappointed sound of Beca.

I stand up and stand at the foot of the bed as she lifts herself onto her elbows to watch me. I slip my thumbs into my waistband and slide my shorts and panties down my legs before stepping out of them and dangling them in front of Beca, who lets out a growl and crawls towards me, taking the clothing out of my hand and throwing it across the room before grabbing me around the waist and dumping me back on the bed.

"God, the things I want to do to you." She husks and suddenly I can't find words. Words don't want to work. What even are words?

She leans down to my ear and the thing she whispers has me literally begging.

"I want to fuck you so hard you'll get wet just thinking about it tomorrow."

"Please Bec. Baby I need you, now."

She reaches between us and pumps herself a couple times before gently and slowly entering me. I grunt slightly, because, well, I mean it's been a long ass time since I've had anything this big inside me.

She stops when she is fully inside me.

"You okay?" She asks sweetly.

I nod, getting lost in those dark grey eyes of hers and she starts thrusting, slowly, gently, making sure I'm okay.

I dig my nails into her shoulder blades as I try to control my moans before panting, "Faster."

She thrusts harder and faster and my moans are harder and harder to control, just when I think I'm losing it she covers my mouth again with her hand and I moan into it, my nails digging harder into her back.

"Chlo, I'm gonna...In or out?" She pants, ending with a moan.

It doesn't take me long to make up my mind, especially with all the adrenaline rushing through me.

"In, baby, come in me."

Those words seemed to have triggered her because the second they were out of my mouth she froze, shooting her load into me, which pushed me over the edge, luckily her hand was still over my mouth because my orgasm hit me so hard and fast that my moans became screams.

She waited until we had both come down before removing her hand and pulling out of me. I lay there, still panting, one hand in my hair and the other over my heart as I try to return it to it's normal beating.

That was incredible, amazing even. I have no idea how she has that much of an effect on me, especially in the short time we've been together, but she just...she makes me feel electrified, charged, and that's how the air feels when I'm around her.

It makes me wonder if I have that effect on her. I turn my head as I watch her get up and start pulling on her clothes, and in that moment, I felt like a cheap, dirty whore. She fucked me and now she's up and getting dressed, probably to head back to her wife.

I sit up and I can't help the tears that well up in my eyes. I know this is how it has to be, but that doesn't, mean that it doesn't hurt. I must have made some kind of noise because Beca is now sitting beside me, fully clothed, her arm around my shoulders as she shushes me and kisses my head.

"You're leaving now, aren't you?" I sniff and feel her body slump beside me.

"Yeah, I have to. I can't sleep in here with you baby." She sighs.

"Why not? Who cares what she thinks when she finds out Beca? Who gives a fuck?"

"I give a fuck Chloe." She growls as she stands up.

I know I hit a boiling point. I just blew up on her and now she's pissed at me. Nice going Beale.

"I give a fuck because she's my wife, the mother of my son and she deserves a hell of a lot more of an explanation than catching us in bed together."

"I know, Becs, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

"I want to be with you Chloe, but for now this is how it has to be."

"I know." I say, just barely above a whisper as she tilts my head up to press a kiss to my forehead before walking to the door, peaking out before turning back to me.

"Night Red." She smirks before heading out, closing the door behind her.

"Night Beca." I whisper to the darkness before laying down and resigning myself to a night of no sleep.


	12. She Knows

I turn over and watch the sunrise come streaming through my window. After last night I should feel well rested, satisfied, but I don't. Honestly I feel weird. I feel almost sick to my stomach when I think about what happened last night.

How could she just get up and leave like that?

I get it.

I do.

She doesn't want Sarah catching us and I can understand that, but she could've stayed for a little while, just to cuddle or something, but no, she just came, pulled out and fucked off.

Okay, so I don't want to be that girl that has to have cuddles after sex, but in our situation I kind of do need it as another reassurance that I'm not just an affair to Beca.

I know I need to talk to her, and I will, today, somehow I will find time to talk to her about all this and how it should be played. I can't be the girl that waits around for a fuck or a little attention, knowing that after all is said and done she'll go back to her wife. I have too much respect for myself to do that and she needs to know that it won't be happening. It's not like I'm going to pressure her into making a decision today, I'm just letting her know what I need in the meantime, while she takes her time, figuring out how to end it with Sarah.

I roll over and reach for my phone on the nightstand. I unlock it to a message from Aubrey.

 _Aub: Hey, how's things going?_

I sigh and decide to call her instead of writing a very lengthy reply.

"Seriously? That's it? She just...left?" Aubrey scoffed as I recounted yesterday and last night.

I nod in the affirmative and she sighs, well, kind of more like a grunt of displeasure.

"Chloe, I don't think this is good for you, being with someone so young is one thing, but Beca is married and has a child Chlo. She's not good for you."

"Are you saying this as a piece of advice, or is it just because you don't like her?"

"I'm saying this because I'm your bestfriend and I want the best for you, regardless of my personal feelings."

"I can't help myself Bree. I love her." I say sadly.

I have never admitted it out loud, and now that I have, the truth in my words hit me like a tonne of bricks.

I am in love with Beca, that much I knew, the only thing I didn't know was just how in love I was. I have it bad.

I can't help how I feel and these feelings hit me hard and fast and I was powerless to stop it.

"That may be Chlo, but that doesn't mean it will work out in your favour. Has she told you she loves you?"

I stay silent while I process what Aubrey means.

"...Well, no, but it's still early, we haven't been together that long."

"Chloe, you know you love her this early, and if you feel this strongly then would she not too already be feeling it?"

"Well yeah, but..."

But nothing Chloe Beale, this girl will hurt you, and if she doesn't, then the situation will."

"Yeah, but Aubrey..."

"It will eat at you till it kills you."

"Aubrey..."

"I will not see my best friend broken down like that."

"Aubrey Posen! Listen to me right now!" I yell down the phone, which silences her almost immediately.

"I love her, I know that, but I also know her well enough to know that she doesn't say how she feels most of the time. She isn't good with feelings and emotions. Just because she hasn't told me doesn't mean she doesn't love me, even though she might not know it herself yet. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me."

I sigh before continuing.

"She makes me feel safe Aubrey, only two other people in my life have made me feel that safe. You and Jesse, that's it, and I wasn't wrong about either of you. She looks at me like I'm the only other person in the room, even when we are with Sarah, and she cares about me. She really cares about me. She's everything I've ever wanted, yes the situation is crap, but she's worth it."

Aubrey is silent for a moment before she lets out a long, slow breath.

"Wow. I've never heard you talk about a girl like that before."

"Yeah, well now you have, so you can let it go because she isn't going anywhere."

I creep downstairs and start a pot of coffee.

I'm just pouring a cup when I feel arms wrap around my waist and a soft kiss, that brings a smile to my lips, pressed to the back of my neck.

"Hey you. What are you doing up this early?" She asks quietly, as if she were telling me a big secret.

I shrug and take a sip of my coffee before answering her.

"Couldn't really sleep. Why are you?"

I feel her nip at me gently.

"I couldn't stop thinking about last night." I can hear the smirk in her voice as she gently rocks our hips from side to side, playfully.

I bite my lip, I should talk to her about this. Now is the time.

"Beca, about last night..."

"Good morning you two!" I hear before feeling Beca's presence move away from me quickly.

"Morning honey. What are you doing up?" Beca greets Sarah as she makes her way into the kitchen.

"Well, somebody wanted to say good morning." She smiles as she enters with Ollie cradled in her arms, he was fussing slightly in her hold.

Beca smiled and took him from her, nuzzling her nose against his soft, pink cheek.

"Good morning my little man." She coos and I watch them, a small smile on my face, picturing what it would be like when me and Beca have a kid.

I quickly snap myself back into reality and shake my head to dispel the fantasy. As I watch the two I notice that he still won't stop fussing, like he's reaching for something. Beca follows his arms and she looks at me, slightly worried, it's then I realise that he's reaching for me.

Beca hands him to me and I rock him gently, patting his behind and humming quietly. He settles quickly and I look up at Sarah who has a strange look her face, like she's puzzled about something.

"Um, Becs, baby, I have to run a few errands today and I was wondering if you could help me."

Beca looks at her and nods. "Yeah, sure, but what about Chloe?"

"I can babysit while you go out with Sarah." I jut in, secretly looking forward to spending some time alone with Ollie.

Beca shoots me a look and I just shrug.

"You sure you don't mind Chloe?" Sarah asks and I nod, even though it kills me that I won't be able to talk to Beca today about last night.

"Of course, go have fun you two." I put on my best, fake, Beale smile.

Sarah heads back upstairs to get ready for the day while Beca starts running me through his schedule and telling me where everything is, just like a normal parent would do, when they're leaving their kid with someone else.

"I'll be fine Beca, don't worry." I reassure her with a laugh.

She nods, "Yep, right, good. You'll call if you need anything?"

"Yes Beca." I roll my eyes.

"Because I don't have to go. I can stay."

"Baby! Go!" I chuckle and push her shoulder to start her out of the room.

When I finish my coffee, I head upstairs with Ollie, to clothe him for the day, as I pass the master bedroom I hear Sarah and Beca arguing in hushed voices. I stop to listen in.

Yeah, I know I shouldn't, but I'm a Beale, what can I say, we're a curious bunch.

"You barely even know her Rah. She's a good person."

Are they arguing about me?

"I don't doubt that, but she just seems a little...I don't know, fake. I mean don't get me wrong, she's polite and smart and funny, but she doesn't seem genuine."

Excuse me, I happen to be very genuine, just not with the wife of my lover.

There's a beat of silence before Beca's voice is heard again.

"What's this really about?"

Yeah, I'd like to know that too.

"Nothing Bec, I just don't like her."

How could she not like me? I'm a Beale, everyone loves me. Yeah I know that sounded a little vein, but honestly it's true.

"Why, because she could soothe our son when we couldn't? That's just because she exudes calm, she's got this vibe about her that makes everything calm, everything just goes radio silent and it has a way to make you believe in the good side of life."

Another beat of silence.

"Do you have feelings for her?"

I stand in shock for a while, before telling myself that I've heard enough. I continue on to take Ollie to his room, not waiting for Beca's answer.


	13. She Definitely Knows

**A/N: Sorry about the cliff-hanger ladies, gents and people of other or no gender. I hope this makes up for it. Enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review and let me know what you think.**

 **ALSO! The sequel to 'MOT' will be coming out in the next week, so look out for that and also a full story to the one shot I wrote over Christmas will be coming very soon. If you haven't read the one shot yet, I suggest you do because the story will be a prequel and also a sequel to it.**

 **Anyways, on with the chapter.**

I should have kept listening.

No, I shouldn't have.

Yes I should.

No, I shouldn't.

I can't decide if I made the right decision to walk away or not.

I mean, they still left together and they seemed to be well put together, so maybe Beca told her that she had no feelings for me beyond friendship, and that's okay...

Really, it's alright...

It's fine, I guess...

Okay, okay, it hurts a little, even if that's not what she told Sarah, the thought still hurts.

I get it, like I've said before, she needs to work things out at her own pace and I respect that, but that doesn't mean that I can't feel upset, or anxious.

But, I don't want to talk about any of that right now, because I'm excited to spend the whole day with Ollie. It'll be good for us to bond that way Beca says she wants us to and I am a little upset at the fact that I can't really talk to Beca about everything I'm feeling until we can be alone and have enough privacy to do so. So, I have to wait and I can deal with that, I guess I have to.

The day flies by and before I know it, it's five thirty. I decide to get up and make dinner for us all for when Beca and Sarah get back. I put Ollie in his high chair and turn the stereo on to dance to while I cook.

I love music while I'm doing, well anything really. It relaxes me and excites me all at once and it makes time go faster.

As I dance and cook I hear Ollie babbling. I look over to him and dance over to his highchair, picking him up and swinging him around with me as he babbles and giggles.

God, this feels so natural, so perfect. This is what I want my life to look like once I finish college and the more I think about it, the more I picture Beca and Ollie with me and it always brings a smile to my face.

There are times when Beca and I are in my apartment and we're cooking or lounging around, or making out on the couch, or cuddled up in bed and it always brings a smile to my face at how domestic and perfect it feels. It feels like that's where I meant to be and right here with Ollie, I feel the same way.

It hurts to know that Beca will have to move back here once this year is over, so she can finish her degrees at Julliard and I'm okay with that, the thought just makes me sad, especially if she hasn't broken things off with Sarah by then, but I'm sure we will manage.

Beca and Sarah walk in the door, hand in hand, just as I'm plating up the lasagne I made for dinner.

"Smells great Chlo." I hear Beca moan in appreciation as they enter the kitchen.

"You didn't have to cook Chloe." Sarah tells me as she makes a beeline for Ollie, kissing the top of his head.

"Really, Sarah, I don't mind at all." I shoot her a smile over my shoulder as I set the plates at the table.

Beca tickles her son's stomach as she walks past his highchair to sit at the table, Sarah sits next to her and I sit across from them.

"So what did you and the little monster do today?" Beca asks as she piles a forkful of lasagne into her mouth.

God, she eats like she hasn't eaten in days. It's cute, especially when she smiles around her mouthful.

"Beca, slow down and eat properly." Sarah scolds and Beca visibly restrains herself.

God, I hate that. Beca is her wife, not her child. Beca is an adult and she can eat however she damn well wants to eat.

"It was good. We played peek-a-boo and we watched High 5 and had our own little dance party. Didn't we, little man?" I coo the last part at him and he gurgles in response.

"A dance party without me? Ollie how could you? I feel betrayed young man." Beca teasingly scolds the boy.

The rest of dinner goes by quietly until Beca stands to clear the table.

"I'll do it Becs. Go clean Ollie up." Sarah demands more than asks.

Beca bites her lip as I shoot a raised eyebrow at her, before she picks him up and takes him upstairs.

I take the plates to the sink and I can immediately feel the tension radiating from her. I glance over my shoulder to see she's staring at me with her arms crossed.

So, you and Beca are best friends?"

I bite my lip and subtly clear my throat before answering her.

"Yeah, she's a great friend and a wonderful vocal coach and dancer."

"Look, Beca doesn't really have a lot of friends. She's...different."

Oh my God, I can't believe she is really talking about her own wife like this. Sarah doesn't know that I know about Beca's condition, yet she's about to tell me about it, without Beca's consent. What the hell? What if Beca didn't want me knowing?

"I already know." I put the dishrag down and turn to face her fully.

Sarah's eyebrows reach her hairline. "She told you?"

"Yeah, and I don't care. She's still the same girl I feel in...to at rehearsal."

Phew, that was close. Good save Beale.

"She's in love with you." She tells me, surprisingly calm.

"What? Did she tell you that?" My heart is beating so fast that I think I might pass out.

"No, she doesn't have to."

I swallow the lump in my throat as she continues.

"I see the way she looks at you. I'm not blind. It's the same way she used to look at me. She hasn't looked at me like that for a long time, since before Ollie was born. She didn't even look at me like that on our wedding day, but I told myself over and over that she still loves me, or she wouldn't have stayed."

She reaches up to wipe some tears from under her eyes.

"I was kidding myself wasn't I? She doesn't love me anymore. She loves you."

"Sarah, I don't know what you're talking about, we're just friends." I try to deflect, but she hits right back.

"Friends don't look at each other like that Chloe. Friends don't make you feel like you're the only person in the room. Friends don't hug you like they're terrified they'll lose you if they let go."

How does she know exactly how Beca makes me feel?

"Be honest with me Chloe. Are you in love with her?"

I sigh and nod my head, deciding it's best to be honest with her.

"Have you slept with her?" She asks and her voice shakes and breaks.

I bite my lip and look down and apparently that's enough of an answer for her because her sadness turns to anger very quickly.

"Get the fuck out of my house."


	14. We'll Be Okay

**A/N: Another chapter. Aren't you guys lucky. I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review and let me know what you think. I know it's short but I just needed to end this on a bittersweet note before moving forward with the story.**

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. Get the fuck out of my house. I don't want some cheap, home wrecker, whore in my house around my son and wife!" She raises her voice at me and I'm taken back for a second.

 _Home wrecker?_ Is she serious? I never had any intention of destroying Beca's marriage, not like it was much of one to begin with.

"I'm not a home wrecker. It's not my fault that Beca isn't in love with you anymore. She hasn't been for a while, you said it yourself, and I don't appreciate being called a whore thank you very much."

"Fuck you!" She yells, which sends Beca running down the stairs in seconds.

"What the hell is going on down here?"

"You lied to me Beca! You said there was nothing going on between the two of you! I can't believe you could lie to my face like that!"

Beca reaches for her as she takes a step away.

"Don't you dare fucking touch me right now!"

"You need to keep your voice down or you'll wake Ollie." She warns.

"I don't give a fuck! You lied to me and you're cheating on me with this skank!"

"Whoa, hey!" It's Beca's turn to raise her voice as I shrink into the background, not wanting to make things worse.

"How dare you call her that! She has been nothing but respectful to you since she walked into our home!"

"Yeah, while you two were fucking behind my back!"

"It's not just about sex! Jesus Christ!"

"Then what is it about?!"

"I-I'm...in love with her Sarah,"

My eyes widen and I swallow hard. Did she seriously just say that she's in love with me? Did that really just happen?

I look to Sarah who looks angry, but mostly just broken and sad.

"And I know that hurts you, but I can't help how I feel. She makes me feel like I can do anything. She makes me feel safe. She makes me want to be a better person. I love waking up to her and going to bed with her and every little moment in between. I tried with you. I really tried to force myself into falling in love with you again, over and over, until I met her and since then I've realised that I can't force myself to love you because I love her."

I bite my lip against the smile wanting to grace my lips and look at the ground, my head snapping up at the sound of a slap echoing through the kitchen. I see Beca with her hand to her face, but she doesn't look shocked in the slightest.

"Get out! Both of you! Now! Pack your shit and leave!"

Beca nods and looks at me as a direction. I nod sadly and head upstairs to start packing. I'm sad because I never meant for this to happen, not this way, and I'm pretty sure Beca didn't want this either. I grab our bags and head back downstairs, still hearing the yelling in the kitchen. It sounds like Beca is pleading with her over something. I pause out of sight to listen in.

"You can't do that Sarah! He's my son too!"

"Watch me! You don't deserve to be a mother to him anymore Beca! You should've thought about that before you slept with someone else!"

"I'll fight you on this if I have to! I refuse to let him go! He's my son and I love him just as much as you do!"

I decide I've heard enough and walk into the kitchen, handing Beca her bag as she pushes past Sarah on our way to the front door, slamming it once we're outside.

I stay silent, because I know that Beca needs to sort through her thoughts and emotions. She pulls her phone out and dials a number.

"Hey, Em, can you come pick Chloe and I up from Sarah's and take us to the airport."

Silence.

"That doesn't matter. I'll explain when you get here." She says definitively before hanging up and dropping her bag on the sidewalk.

I bite my lip and try to process the fact that Beca admitted out loud that she loves me. I'm taken by surprise as arms wrap tightly around my waist and pull me close to her. She buries her head in my neck and I can feel her breath on my throat. Warm and fast.

I hear her sniff and feel something wet hit my neck and I realise she's crying. I just wrap my arms around her and rub her back soothingly, occasionally pressing kisses to her head.

"I love you." She whispers, so quietly that I have to strain to hear her. I smile sadly and pull back to get her to look at me, my hands cupped around her face.

"I love you too. We'll figure all this out. I promise you." I say with conviction as she leans up and kisses me softly, chastely.

It's moments like this that I realise that Beca doesn't do this often. She's not normally vulnerable, sweet and unguarded.

She usually puts up walls, so that no one can get in and affect her and I'm glad I'm one of the few people to see this side of her. She's sensitive and sweet and so small in moments like this. It just makes me want to wrap her up and protect her. She's so young and she's had to deal with so much already. I just want to ease her pain and suffering, by giving her as much love and affection as I can.


	15. We Need To Talk

**A/N: I know you want longer chapters for all my fics, but here's the thing: I work two jobs and I honestly don't have the time to even sleep, let alone write longer chapters. I'm sorry that I can't give you longer chapters, but it is what it is. Thank you for supporting my fics though and I am so grateful for every review I get. Anyways, enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review!**

So, it's been about two weeks since we left New York and ever since we have, Beca has been distant. I don't really blame her, after the clip of the argument I heard between her and Sarah about Ollie. She's upset at the thought of losing her son. I'm trying to be there for her, but she won't even talk to me. We've barely spent a night together since we left and I'm a little worried. The only time I've seen her has been at rehearsals and the occasional lunch together. I need her to talk to me. I need to know what's going on inside her head so that I can at least try to help, but she's giving me nothing to work with. I need to confront her about this, but I'm scared that if I try, she'll run. She won't talk about it and she's being distant, but everyday she tells me she loves me, whether it is in a text or after rehearsals, she always tells me, everyday. She tells me how special I am to her and that she doesn't want to lose me and it breaks my heart to think she's doing it to make sure I don't leave her because she has no one else. I mean, I know she loves me, but I think she's scared that I suddenly won't feel the same way about her, like I'll wake up one morning and realise I don't love her, which won't happen, of course, but I think she's still worried it might.

"What do I do Jesse?" I ask him one day after rehearsal.

"You need to talk to her about all this Chlo, I can't fix your relationship with her, only you can do that." He sighs and wraps his arm around my shoulder.

I love Jesse, I really do, but remind me again why I go to him for advice? He's so neutral sometimes.

"But I'm scared." I whine, and okay, I know I sound childish but don't judge me.

"Babes, I know you are, but you've got to do something. You can't just ignore it and hope it will go away, love doesn't work like that. Love is hard and you have to work at it, I mean look at what happened with me and Troy. I tried to ignore it and it just made things worse."

I should explain, see Troy was Jesse's high school boyfriend, senior year and Jesse caught him sleeping with the quarterback of the football team. I know...SCANDAL! Anyways, Jesse let it go and acted like they were okay, but then Troy left Jesse and it absolutely broke his heart. I had to console him for months.

"I know Jesse, but it's not like Beca is cheating on me."

"Regardless of the situation, if you don't do something, something will happen that will hurt you and I don't want to see you hurt."

I sigh and lean into him more as he rubs my arm.

"Women suck."

"And that's why I'm gay, honey."

My talk with Jesse just confirmed all of what I already knew, *sigh*, I guess it's unavoidable. I need to talk to her. I'll do it after rehearsal on Saturday. Definitely.

Saturday's rehearsal was intense, we ran through the whole show basically and by the time my scene with Tom, Rocky, came around, I glanced at Beca and she looked...angry? I shrugged it off and continued right through the dance number, right up to the point where Tom crawls over me. I throw a glance over at Beca again and watch as she storms out of the building. There's nothing I can do about it right now, but as soon as we exit the stage I run through the back door and see her, leaning against the building, arms crossed.

I approach her and put my hand against her shoulder, which she quickly shrugs off. What is going on with her?

"You need to talk to me Bec."

"Don't wanna talk." She shrugs, not even looking at me.

"Well, you're going to have to! You can't just storm out of a rehearsal! I don't understand what's going on with you!"

Okay, so I raised my voice at her, but I'm just so frustrated not knowing what is going on with her.

"You didn't really seem to care. I saw you with him, you were turned on."

I raise my eyebrows in surprise. Does she really think that Tom turns me on? *Gag*

"Are you serious right now? Beca you know I'm gay."

"I know, but that doesn't mean you can't be turned on by him! You loved it!"

"I wasn't turned on!" I throw my arms up and yell as a couple of students walk past. I put my head down as they stare at us.

"I don't want him Beca. I want you. I LOVE you."

Beca's silent for a few seconds before muttering, "I'm losing everything."

I bite my lip and tilt her chin with my finger to force her to look at me.

"You're not losing me. You will never lose me. You know what I picture when I'm acting with him? I picture you instead of him. It makes it easier to act out my attraction to him when I picture you."

She sighs and wraps her arms around my waist, burying her head in my neck, much the same way as she did back in New York after the fight with Sarah. I love holding her like this, it brings a smile to my face and in these moments I couldn't love her more. She's so soft and vulnerable.

I run my fingers through her hair and place a gentle kiss on the top of her head.

"What do you say we ditch the rest of rehearsal, go back to my apartment and talk?"

I feel her nod before she steps back and takes my hand, leading me over to my car.

The whole drive back to my apartment she wouldn't let go of me. She either held my hand or put her hand on my thigh. I think it was her way of apologizing for getting angry at me. I just smile and run my hand through her hair, scratching at the back of her scalp. She takes my hand and brings it around to her lips, pressing light kisses on my palm.

"I'm sorry I got angry and accused you." She says softly as we sit on the couch.

"It's okay, but you need to tell me what you're feeling and thinking. I want to help you baby, but I can't do that if you won't talk to me."

She looks down and nods.

"Sarah threatened to take Ollie away from me and I feel angry that she would threaten that. I feel like I'm going to lose my son and if I lose him then I lose the one thing that gave any meaning to my life, till you. I don't want to lose him Chloe. I can't lose him."

I swallow hard and bite my lip at the tears threatening to spill. She looks so small right now and I just want to hold her and console her, but we need to get through this talk first.

"You won't lose him. I will do everything I can to make sure that doesn't happen. We will fight Sarah on this. I won't let it happen. She has no right to take him from you Beca. He is biologically yours. The law is on your side here."

"How do you know that?"

"Look, we will talk to Aubrey, I'm sure she can help us figure all this out okay?"

She nods and leans down to rest her head in my lap. I run my hands through her hair.

"I love you."

"I love you too Becs. I won't leave you. Ever."


	16. He's Not Yours to Fight For

Things between Beca and I have been good, sort of, she's still closed off but she's getting better at not taking her frustrations out on me and instead talking to me when she feels angry or upset. It makes me feel better knowing that we have the open communication between us. I spoke to Aubrey about what our options are if and when we have to take Sarah to court over the custody of Ollie and she told me that although Beca does have a biological claim over him, courts will tend to side with the mother in these situations, especially since Beca is always moving around for school. Hearing that crushed me so much that I haven't even told Beca, every time she tried to ask about it I deflected, because I can't exactly straight out lie to her, but I didn't want to hurt her by telling her the truth. Hopefully it doesn't get as far as going to court. Hopefully, Sarah isn't petty enough to actually try and take Ollie away from Beca.

The news also crushed me because, even though I've only met him once and I've known him for such a short time, I consider him to be like a son to me as well, and I know that may sound a bit weird but, I can't help that that's the way I feel.

I knew the truth will come out eventually, and it did, in the worst way possible. Sarah contacted Beca to let her know she is talking with her lawyers about the situation, so Beca demanded to sit down with Aubrey and discuss her options, and Aubrey, never being one to lie or beat around the bush told Beca to her face, exactly how it would work.

"Look, Beca, I'm not going to lie to you. Your chances of gaining even 50/50 custody are low. We could possibly aim for supervised visits, but like I told Chloe, chances are slim at this point, even if we prove that he is biologically yours."

"Wait, you told Chloe all of this?" Beca glares at me, half in confusion and half in what can only be described as betrayal.

I swallow hard and prepare myself for the yelling match that I know is about to take place between the two of us. Aubrey, thankfully, excuses herself from the room to give us some privacy.

"Beca, before you get angry, I just want you to know that I was only trying to protect you."

"Protect me?! You thought that lying to me was protecting me?! I can't believe this!" She yells as she stands and barges into the kitchen.

Against my better judgement I get up and follow her.

"Yes! Because I love you and I hate seeing you getting upset over all this!"

"You could have at least told me, like: 'Hey, Beca you might not ever get to see your son again.'!"

"Don't give me sarcasm right now Beca Mitchell! I did what I thought was best at the time! I'm trying! I'm trying to be there for you, to help you in any way that I can so we don't lose him!"

"We?! _We?!_ There is no _we_ Chloe! He's my son and it's not your fight, it's mine!"

"Did you seriously just say that to me?!" Her words hit me like a blunt knife to the stomach.

"He's not your son! You're not his mother and you'll never be!"

I bite my lip and swallow the lump in my throat as she yells the truth, right to my face. I know it's the truth but the sting from her saying to me felt like a slap in the face. I need to get out of here. I can't be here right now, not when she's behaving like this when all I was trying to do was help.

"If that's how you feel." I sigh and walk out of my apartment, car keys in hand.

I have no idea where I'm going to go, but all I know is that I need to get out of here. There's one place I could go, but it'd be too obvious to Beca and I know she'll follow me once she's calmed down, but honestly, I need to know I've calmed down before I can even look at her again, let alone talk about this.

I drive away from campus, through the streets of Barden, no destination in mind, just her words replaying over and over in my mind.

' _He's not your son.'_

' _You're not his mother and you'll never be.'_

I drive past a local bar and make my decision. It's not a smart decision, but it's all I got at the moment. I make a U-turn and pull into the parking lot.

The rest of the night is a blur, until I close the front door of the apartment early the next morning and within two seconds, Beca is in my face.

"I have been worried sick about you Chloe. Where were you?"

"Did realise that it was any of your business." I shrug her off and push past her to go to the bathroom to shower.

Unfortunately Beca follows me.

"Of course it's my business. My girlfriend disappears for a whole night and comes in the next morning looking like she's been run over by a truck and reeking of whiskey and vodka."

"I went out and had a couple of drinks. Why does it matter? I'm a grown ass adult Beca." I groan as I step into the shower, hoping that Beca gets the message and just leaves me alone, but I'm not that lucky.

"Can we at least talk about last night?"

Now this feels like a total role reversal to me, because usually Beca is the one to avoided, but right now I'm doing the avoiding.

"No, we can't. Look I'm still drunk. I just want to shower, drink water and go to sleep."

"Oh. Do-do you want me to go back to my dorm and leave you alone?"

I can hear the upset in her voice and although I'm still mad at her about last night, I decide that I don't really want to be alone right now.

As I shut off the water and step out of the shower to wrap a towel around my body I sigh and look up at her, sitting on the bathroom counter.

"Actually. I want you to stay and cuddle with me, but I don't want to talk about last night. Okay?"

Beca lets a small smile grace her lips before getting down and kissing my forehead as she heads out of the bathroom.

I get ready for bed in the bathroom and slowly make my way to my bedroom, where there's a glass of water and aspirin waiting on my nightstand, and Beca is already sitting up in bed waiting for me.

I take the pills and gulp the water down before crawling in next to her and I immediately feel her arms wrap around me and it makes me smile. She presses a kiss to my shoulder and as my eyes close I hear her whisper, "I'm sorry about what I said last night."

I know it's only a small thing, not even a proper apology, but for now I accept it and let myself succumb to my alcohol fuelled sleep.


	17. Relieving Tension

**A/N: Okay, I know I've been absent for a really long time but I've had to adult and work like all the time but hopefully this chapter is worth the wait. Don't forget to review and let me know what you all think.**

For two weeks after our fight everything was good, until Beca got the dreaded letter.

 _Preliminary Divorce Papers_

Beca obviously signed them without hesitation but called Aubrey to talk about Sarah's demands for the divorce. Basically she wanted Beca to pay child support but no custody, not even supervised visits for Ollie and Sarah wanted half of whatever Beca had, due to her _adultery._ Aubrey promised to try and get Beca supervised visits, but the rest of the demands were out of her hands, because for an adultery claim they were pretty reasonable.

"How could she fucking do this to me?!" Beca yelled as she slammed the papers onto the kitchen counter.

It hurt me to see her like this. She was broken and there was nothing I could do to help, plus we also had the show which, opening night was in a couple of days and nothing was up to the standard it should be, so we were both also stressing out about that.

"Beca, it'll be okay. You'll see, everything will work out how it should." There I go again, trying to be the optimistic one, but even I can see that things are looking pretty hopeless at the moment. It's honestly times like now, where I regret jumping into a relationship with her, knowing her situation, but of course I would never voice this aloud.

"How Chloe? Tell me how this will be okay? He's my son."

I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her waist, cuddling into her back.

"I honestly don't know but I still have hope."

"God, I just really need a damn distraction from all this bullshit."

Well, there we go. I'm the master at distractions. I bite my lip and move her hair out of the way and leave soft kisses up her neck to her ear.

"Really Chloe? Right now?" She sighs and tilts her head to the side.

"You said you needed a distraction." I whisper in her ear before biting the lobe and pulling gently.

"Not that kind of distraction."

"Oh, come on Beca we haven't had sex in weeks, this might help take your mind off everything."

Beca sighs and turns to face me. "I'm sorry. I've been neglecting you for a while. I know that but I'm just so fucking stressed."

"Which is why I want to help you relieve some tension." I purr and pull her closer by her belt loops and kiss her deeply.

Surprisingly, that's all it takes to twist her arm and I quickly find myself on the kitchen counter, my legs and arms wrapped around her, while she kisses me back, licking into my mouth deeply and I can't help the deep moan that leaves me. Her responding growl absolutely soaks me. It's deep and animalistic, like I'm her prey and she the predator.

She moves down and leaves hot, wet kisses down my neck, stopping at the one spot just below my ear and sucking it into her mouth. I'm positive she left a hickey but I don't even care about that right now. I want her and I'm going to have her.

"I'm going to fuck you right here. Right on this counter."

I moan again, her words sending shock waves to my core. I love it when she talks dirty because the things that come out of her mouth are absolutely disgusting and vile and I can't get enough of it. I honestly never thought I would be the type that loves to be abused in the bedroom but here I am, on the brink of begging her to fuck me hard, rough and dirty.

She reaches up and pulls my hair at the roots, causing my head to fall back, leaving me neck open for her to kiss, lick and suck until I'm shaking with need.

"You're so cute like this. Shaking, out of control, under my hand. God, Chlo, I'm hard already just looking at you like this."

"Please Beca."

"Please what?"

"Please fuck me." I hardly ever swear and I've noticed that Beca absolutely loves it when I do. I figured out it's a huge turn on for her.

She growls and pulls me off the counter, turning me to face it and pushing my upper torso down to lie over it. I can't see her but I feel her pull my sweats down with one hand, while the other keeps a tight grip on my hair.

I feel her hardness pressed right up against my ass cheeks and it makes me shiver in anticipation. She runs her fingers along my lips, gathering up the wetness.

"You're so wet already. You must want this real bad."

I squeak and nod as quickly as I can and the next thing I know, she thrusts inside me quickly, barley giving me time to adjust before she starts pounding into me hard and fast.

Her speed and roughness has me almost screaming in ecstasy as she continues her assault, pulling my hair roughly to pull me up so her front is pressed to my back.

It's so hot, being fucked in the middle of the kitchen, with only our bottom halves free from clothing. It's hot, and it's dirty and I love it.

She reaches around and starts rubbing my clit hard and fast, matching the pace she has set with her thrusts. I can feel it building, my orgasm hits me hard, so hard that I actually see black spots. She slows down and eases me down from my high and it's not till my breathing returns to normal that I notice she has yet to have a release. She pulls out of me and I immediately turn around and kneel in front of her, taking her length into my mouth and down my throat with little resistance. Being a singer by trade I've learnt to relax my throat extremely and it's not till she in encased by my throat that I start clenching the muscles in my throat and it's not long till she releases down my throat. I swallow gratefully and wipe the edges of my mouth as I stand on shaky legs.

"Shall we continue in the bedroom?" Beca suggests and I nod eagerly, following her to the bedroom.

The next couple of days are a whirlwind of excitement and craziness as we rehearse nonstop for opening night. The day before opening night we do our first dress rehearsal and I notice that Beca can barely take her eyes off me the entire time, because well...most of the show I'm in lingerie and I can admit that I look damn hot. After rehearsals we decided to go out for a cast party at a local club, Beca being 19 usually wouldn't have been allowed in but after some persuasion on my part with the bouncer she was let in and the night was a blast. Just having fun, drinking and dancing with my friends and my girlfriend and just having the time to relax and chill out before the shows start was nice. Well...that was until I noticed a familiar woman standing at the bar. After a closer inspection I realised who it was and I was beyond shocked they even knew where to find us...Sarah.

 **A/N 2: The next chapter will continue from where this one ends so look out for that coming very soon...I wonder what will happen?**


	18. I Can't Take This

**A/N: I know, I know. I'm sorry I have disappeared for a while. Unfortunately chapters for all my stories will be far and few between as a lot has happened to me this year. I'd just like to say, sorry and Happy Holidays to you all.**

 _Sarah?!_

 _What the flipping fudge is she doing here?!_

"Chloe? What's wrong?" Beca asks, noticing the look on my face.

She turns to follow my gaze and their eyes meet, Beca's looking wild and furious. If I didn't know what she was about to do I would've found it so sexy. She makes her way across the club, me pulling along behind her, begging and pleading for her to just leave it.

Beca turns around and points those wild, angry eyes at me. I swallowed hard, a little afraid of her in the moment.

"She's trying to take my son away from me, Chloe! You might not understand because you're not a mother!'

That stung. I stand there in total shock as Beca heads towards Sarah. I don't hear the words Beca is spewing at her until a big, hulking man moves next to Sarah, wrapping his arm around her. I see Beca point her gaze at him and begin to arguing with him.

I see Beca pause for a second, like something shocked her, before throwing a punch directly into his jaw. Beca attacks him, he tries to restrain her and manages to get a hit on her cheek. Bouncers come and pull them apart, dragging them out different exits, Beca screaming obscenities the whole way out.

I immediately follow out the way they dragged Beca and find her on the curb out the front, pacing and muttering to herself.

"What the hell Beca?!" I yell as I approach her.

"You can't say things like that to me! I'm only trying to help you!"

"Just back off Red" She growls and I am honestly scared of her right now.

"You want me to back off? Fine. I'm going and don't you dare follow until you can talk to me with a little decency." I turn around and walk away, only to hear her running after me.

I feel her hand grab my arm and spin me around to face her and suddenly our lips are connected. Hers hungry and desperate. Mine angry and wild. It's not until we are stumbling into my apartment and up to my room that I realise, I'm supposed to be angry with her right now. I pull away and lay a hard sharp slap to her face and begin pushing her off of me, while she remains in control of my body, pulling me closer to her as I push away. Eventually I end up submitting and allowing my body to move however she desires it to. She kisses me roughly again before pulling back, her stormy blue eyes alight with a fire I had seen once before. The day in the soundproof rehearsal room. The memory of that day making me shiver with excitement.

"I love you. You know I do. This is just a...tough situation. Maybe we should..."

And then it hits me.

"Are you seriously about to break up with me?"

She looks at the ground and sighs. That's all I need to hear as I slap her once more, only this time pulling her into me and kissing her with all the desperation and anger I can muster. We fall onto the bed for one of the hottest nights we've ever had.

I wake the next morning, still a little groggy from the alcohol I had consumed the previous night. When all the memories towards the end of the night rush back to me, I sit straight up and look to my left. She's gone.

 _Seriously?_

After all that she just up and leaves? I feel used. I feel dirty, but most of all I feel heartbroken. Beca was the one thing in my life that made sense, besides theatre. The one person I wanted to spend my life with. The one person I've ever loved that much or that fiercely, has just left me in my bed, alone, confused, broken.

How dare she do this to me. Well I won't stand for it, she needs to make up her mind about what she really wants, who she really wants, because I am not going to wait around for her to be mine again. She either is or she isn't and right now I feel like she isn't.

That's it. From now on I'll just focus on myself and my theatre and opening night.

 _Oh shit_ _It's tonight!_

I'd forgotten it was tonight. I jump out of bed and immediately begin to get ready for our last rehearsal.

At rehearsal Beca is nowhere to be found. I can't believe she couldn't even show up to talk to me.

Oh well. The show must go on as they say.


End file.
